THE QUESTIONABLE SPOT

The time will come when you will probably be invited to a place that you’re not sure you ought to visit. Perhaps your friends want to go to that roadhouse that has always looked dangerously intriguing. Maybe they want to go to a public dance hall of which your parents disapprove. What should you do?

The first thing to consider is why you are questioning this particular spot. If it’s definitely the type of place you consider taboo, your problem is simple. But suppose you’re not sure in your own mind about it. Maybe you have just heard rumors; maybe your parents have just dropped vague remarks against it. If you ask around, you will probably find out just why that place is considered off limits by some people. Knowing will help you decide what you want to do. Even if you know something about the place, you may still be tempted to go-just to see for yourself what it’s like.

“Crazy Mixed-up Feelings?”’

Very often teen-agers find that they have a conflict of feelings. You may know that a roadhouse is not suitable for you, but inwardly you very much want to go. Going to that public dance hall may sound thrilling to you. You may be curious to find out for yourself just what it’s like. Yet you know your parents wouldn’t want you to go. Until you get your own reactions straightened out, it will be hard to explain to the others how you feel.

Pro and Con

If you have a question about places to which the crowd might want to go, it helps to decide ahead of time if you would feel comfortable there. One thing you might do is to find out why your friends want to go there. Is it because they really enjoy themselves or is it for a risky “thrill”? Do they really like the spot, or do they go just because they are not supposed to?

Once you know these things, weigh the pros and cons. How much fun do you think you’d have, knowing that you shouldn’t be there in the first place? How would you feel if you were seen by some of your other friends or neighbors? What if your parents found out? Most teen-agers feel that it’s wise to avoid doing anything which they would be ashamed to talk about later.

Getting off the Spot

Saying “No” is not so difficult once you have decided against the place in question. If you really believe what you say, it will be easier for you and more acceptable to your friends. If you are hesitant and say something mealy-mouthed like “Maybe I had better not go,” the others may tease you. But if you are sure of yourself and firm in your reply, they will accept your answer.