Think Before You Park

A girl need not feel obligated to park with a man she doesn’t care for as a person. Letting a man exploit her as a female is no kindness to him, or to her. When an obviously exploitive male goes into his routine, any sensible girl will take heed and extricate herself as quickly and effectively as possible. In fact, if she’s really smart, she will not be there on a car date with him in the first place. Unless she’s sure that both of them have the same general expectations and plans, she won’t accept a car date.

PARENTS HAVE A RIGHT TO WORRY

As soon as sons and daughters start going out, most parents worry that they will find dating situations too difficult to handle. Some of this concern comes from parents’ own memories of their behavior as young people.

A recent cartoon portrays a mother seated in her bed, while Father paces up and down before the window. Through it we see the silhouetted heads of a couple seated close together in a parked car. (The girl is obviously daughter of the house.) Father is upset, worried about what the young people are doing. The mother is saying, “Come on back to bed, Father. Don’t you remember when we were young?” And Father replies, “You’re quite right, I DO remember—that’s what I’m so worked up about.”

A major concern of parents is that their sons and daughters don’t get caught in some sexual jam that will spoil their future for years to come—perhaps catapulting them into a ruined reputation, or a loveless, unhappy marriage. Parents have invested a great deal in their children by the time the teen years come. They don’t want to see their children hurt by situations and forces whose strength and urgency the young people may not be prepared to handle well. But few parents can discuss questions of love, sex, courtship, and marriage with their children to the point where they are sure that their children know all they need to know.

One recent study on a university campus reported that four out of five of all college freshmen said that they could not talk about love, sex, and courtship problems with their parents. Indeed, these were the most difficult questions of all to discuss at home in the experience of the majority of these college students. This reluctance of the younger generation to talk over with their parents the personal questions that bother them about dating is a cause for concern.

Young people who can and do discuss their problems with adults whom they know and respect are fortunate. And their parents are fortunate, too, in being close enough to their own young people so that they know that they can be trusted.

Teachers Are People Too

Schoolteachers and principals are responsible for the conduct of students at school functions. Just let something happen that the public frowns upon, and it is the principal or the dean who must account for the episode. If couples are seen holding hands as they go from class to class, kissing in front of their lockers, or necking and petting at school par ties, some adults feel that something should be done to restrain these demonstrations. In order to protect the reputation of the school, some adult has to see to it that no one couple become obnoxious in their love-making.